Archive for April, 2017

Taking Back My Power

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Be Your Own Superhero

I learned so much these past 3 months competing in Body Building Com, Optimum Nutrition #250kchallenge!

I am down 25 pounds and lost some major inches on my overall body. I learned what proper nutrition was/is and how to use it to fuel my body for the best workouts and incredible recovery. I learned even though I’m not a morning person I can crush a cardio session at the wee hours. I learned how to lift heavy weights and superset with a powerful force. I learned to control my breath and the importance of sleep. I learned my body is a temple capable of incredible strengths.

They say you can do better when you know better. So I’m taking my knowledge, researching and upping my game. I’ve got some big GOALS and am so excited to take BBcom’s next challenge #stillinit with Dymatize.

I’m starting to feel like Wonder Woman

My FOCUS for the next 9 weeks……

Build a Bigger Booty • Defined Arms • Abs/Abs/Abs • Carrie Underwood Legs 🙌🏻

Who’s in it with me?

Deadline to sign up for the next challenge is April 23rd, 2017. Make sure to get your photos uploaded and join this amazing community of individuals supporting each other. #BeingYourBestSelf

Also check out my @Stillinitchallenge Facebook support page for inspiration and motivation!

With a grateful heart & much love,

Crystal

Finding Light In The Darkest Time

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Seeing Light Through The Darkness

This photo holds such significance for me, same bikini yet two completely different people. In the top photo I stand in front of the door looking completely broken and sad. It is that exact door that I had to close and lock after the assault. Every day when I would lock that door or realize I forgot to lock it I would have a terror come over me wondering if he was on the other side. Every noise I heard created so much fear living in what was suppose to be my home sweet home. To have someone come into your home and rip your security away from you and make up feel fearful for your life is heart wrenching.

When I look at that girl in those first photos I wish I could reach out to her, hug her and tell her that things were going to get better. To know I almost wasn’t here 6 months ago is still a process and hard to think about, but I’m working through the process and learning to let go.

I look at the girl in the bottom photos, standing in front of a bright see-through wall with light shining in and see someone that is determined, beautiful and confident. I feel I took my power back, that I now stand strong enough to let my voice be heard. When I eventually went to the police to report the assault, the officer said some women take 20 years to come forward – That broke my heart to know that a woman would carry this pain around with her for all those years.

Since posting my before and after photos, I have had an enormous outpour of love. I have had woman come forward and message me saying that my story has inspired them. That it has given them the courage to finally speak up or take action to change something in their lives. I have sat as women shared stories of being pushed around, badly beaten, hurt, violated, terrified and even fearing for their life. It is unimaginable to know what some women have gone through, some that live to tell their story and some that don’t.

No one should ever be made to feel unsafe and if by me sharing my story helps someone leave or through a bad situation, then everything I went through mattered. I hope if ever you feel in an unsafe situation that you reach out for help. And if you feel you have no one to talk to I am here as your support system always. I wish I had spoken up sooner but believe now I can be a voice for others to hopefully give them the courage they need. If you are or know someone that is in an abusive situation please call 911 or the National DV Hotline.

No one should ever make you feel anything less than beautiful.

So to the girl in the before photos from the girl in the after ones, I say hang in there. Know that this will not be an easy road but that you will come out stronger than you could have ever dreamed. That you will wake up with a new found love for life and that a community will be built because of everything you went through. People will have your back in ways you never imagined. That by being completely vulnerable and raw you will allow others to express that in themselves.

“Rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life”. – J.K. Rowling

Thank you  Body Building ComOptimum NutritionSam ShorkeyTheresa Jenn Lopetrone and Tobias Young for being bright lights at the end of the tunnel!

With a grateful heart and much love,

Crystal

 

 

How I Regained My Life Back!

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Transformation

You name the diet and trend and I’ve dabbled in it. I have been going to the gym for years off and on. Up until this past year I was pretty steady with keeping my weight under control. I have always been an emotional eater though so my weight has fluctuated here and there over the years.

But then 2016 happened where one single event forever changed my life. On February 29th, 2016 I was assaulted in my home and everything around me suddenly became unsafe. I spent the rest of 2016 in a downward spiral and making poor decisions because I did not know how to cope with what had happened. I did everything possible to just numb myself so I did not have to deal with the terror I was feeling inside. I had no idea what PTSD was and the effects that it would have on my life. In less than a year I gained 30 pounds (and I’m only 5ft.3) and started living a very unhealthy lifestyle. To the outside world I may have seemed fine (Instagram post were colourful), but I was spiralling out of control and headed down a dangerous road. I did not know how to ask for help. I hated myself and felt very ugly inside. There was a lot of shame, guilt, disgust and uncertainty.

Dealing with PTSD almost destroyed me, last September I tried to take my life and by the Grace of God I was saved. It was at that very moment that I knew I was given a second chance and had to make some big changes. For 2 months I prayed a lot for something to come into my life to help me get back on track. At the final deadline I saw @bodybuildingcom @optimumnutrition #250KChallenge and took it as a sign that this was going to be the pivot I needed to regain my life back.

In order to make this huge transformation, I needed to find something that challenged me to the extreme – that completely purified my life to really make a new start. That’s when I decided to do my 12 week transformation Vegan. I decided to hire my coach @samshorkey and it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. Not only was her plan amazing, but her style of training really took me to a whole new fitness level. I was doing cardio sessions like a beast, fuelling my body through nutrition and the recovery…… well all I can say is it was phenomenal.

For years I had people tell me that I could not build muscle on a plant based lifestyle, well I sure did prove them wrong…….. I have never in my life had more strength, power and muscle then I do today. Being Vegan does a body good! I am so proud of the transformation I accomplished on the outside, but what blows me away is the internal transformation on my mind and spirit.

Starting this competition I was completely broken, lost and not in a good place. Most of the people in my life didn’t really know the magnitude of my sadness and emptiness. What I learned in these last 12 weeks and the self love that I now have, well that is the biggest prize of it all. If you had told me 12 weeks ago how I would be feeling today, I don’t think I would have believed you.

The support from the community has been absolutely beautiful. I have had people (especially women) open up and share their struggles and thank me for being so vulnerable and honest. To know that I have made even the slightest impact in someones life for doing this challenge and sharing what I have gone through, that is something that I am forever grateful for. I am so thankful for this amazing community that I have become a part of through Body Building com. I plan to continue to share my story in hopes of helping others overcome their own personal struggles.

Sometimes you need others to help life you up and show you some light till you can stand strong on your own and believe you are so worth it. I plan to pay it forward and make it my life’s mission to help others at “Being Their Best Self”.

“The creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Follow those that Inspired me each day at: Body Building Com, Optimum Nutrition, Sam Shorkey, Theresa Jenn Lopetrone and Tobias Young!

With a grateful heart and much love,

Crystal